Mimi

Mimi is bored. Tooth fairies used to be busy, busy busy. But these days work is thin on the ground. She sits on her window sill, hands under her chin, gazing out at a sliver of yellow moon. Time was, she’d be slipping sixpences under pillows as fast as her little wings could carry her. She’d barely have time to sprinkle a few grains of fairy dust onto a sleeping child before she had to be on her way. But now?

She picks at the sequins on her froufrou fairy dress, grumbling to herself. All that brushing and flossing and visits to the hygienist. All that calcium and vegetables. Kale and spinach and broccoli. Whatever happened to fizzy lemonade and toffees and sherbet fountains? Parents have got a lot to answer for, that’s all I can say. No wonder then, Mimi is very, very bored. She double-checks her fairy clipboard to see if there has been a mistake. Nope. She’s got no-one on her list for tonight. Not one child has lost a tooth on her patch today. Not even a wobbly milk tooth. She sighs, and smoothes her tiny, tissuey wings. Might as well pack it in for tonight, she thinks. She flutters down into her pocket-sized bed, tucks in her wings and climbs under the covers.

The next morning, Mimi’s fairy-phone is quiet. No pink flashing light on her answerphone. Not a beep. Nothing. Mimi decides to take a long soak in bath and have a think. She always thinks better in the bath. She fills the tub with glittery bubbles and sinks in to the warm water. Well, this is quite the quandary. What’s a tooth fairy to do if there are no teeth to magic into shiny sixpences? She definitely needs a new job. But, having been a tooth-fairy as long as she can remember, Mimi is finding the idea quite unsettling. She pops bubbles with her fingers and thinks through her options. Unfortunately, a lot of fairy jobs have gone by the wayside over the years. Nobody requires the services of a fairy godmother to turn pumpkins into carriages: they all get Ubers these days. She hasn’t seen a Will o’ the Wisp shooting through the air for years. Tinkerbell gave up the magic business, folded up her wings and became a librarian. Puck packed away his love potions, stuffed his broom in a broom cupboard and retired to the seaside. Jack Frost ended up surplus to requirements as soon as double glazing and central heating took over. So, now it’s the turn of the tooth fairy. Mimi adds more water to her bath by turning on the hot tap with her toes. Yes, time to find a new occupation. But what?

Later that afternoon, Mimi has a visitor. It is Hattie, an ex-fairy-godmother who lives in her neighbourhood. She hung up her wand years ago, but still turns the odd frog into a prince (and back again!) just to keep her hand in. She’s ancient (no-one knows quite how old), but is still quite the force of nature.“Ah! Mimi! There you are my dear.” She sweeps past Mimi air-kissing her on the way. Mimi stares after her for a moment, still holding her door open. She is still standing there as Hattie makes herself at home on Mimi’s bubblegum-pink sofa. “Put the kettle, on there’s a love. I have to have a little chat with you, and that’s best done over a nice cup of tea,” she says, plumping up the cushions behind her back. Mimi nods and blinks and puts the kettle on. Once the tea is made, and they are sitting comfortably, sipping their Earl Grey, Hattie explains the reason for her visit. 

“Well, Mimi my darling, we have a Situation. Fairies, nymphs, elves. Sprites kelpies, pixies… all unwanted. Unneeded. Unimportant. Too many Uns. So what are we to do?” Mimi shrugs. Hattie carries on without taking a breath: “Well, the world has changed Mimi, and we need to change with it. Nowadays children might have all their teeth but they still need a little magic in their lives. That’s where we come in.” Hattie beams. “Right…” says Mimi, not yet convinced. “No time like the present, my dear, let’s get to work.” And with a flick of her wrist, the tea cups, saucers, milk jug and sugar bowl all magic themselves back into the kitchen, washed up and sitting back in their place. Mimi has no time to wonder at Hattie’s remarkable powers as she is taken firmly by the hand and whisked out into the sunshine. 

Before long, they come across a small boy being transported in a snazzy pushchair. His mother, deep in conversation on her mobile, pays him no mind. Her son is antsy, wanting to get out. “Watch this,” whispers Hattie. She sprinkles a little fairy dust onto the phone, which instantly disappears in a wonderful burst of colourful confetti. Mum doesn’t know what just happened and stands with her mouth open like an ‘O’. Her boy, however, is clapping his hands and laughing. Hattie is laughing, too - mostly at the look on Mimi’s face. “Don’t worry, Mimi, it will turn back into a phone at midnight!” Next, they come across a mum sitting at a bus stop with a toddler on her lap. The mum is gazing into the distance, whilst the child is glued to a cartoon playing on tablet. Mimi looks at Hattie: “May I?” she whispers. “Be my guest, my dear!” Mimi waves her wand over the pair: in a split second the tablet turns into a pop-up book about dinosaurs. Mum and toddler look at the book, then at each other, and then at the book again. Mum helps the toddler open the first page: up pops a huge green brontosaurus. The toddler points and giggles. Further down the street they pass by a coffee shop. A man, headphones clamped to his ears, is engrossed in his laptop, while his two small children sit quietly either side of him. One is attempting to make a tower of sugar cubes; the other is playing with the serviette dispenser. Mimi can’t resist. With another wave of her wand, the lap-top is transformed into a pile of Lego. The children launch themselves in without hesitation, while their dad blinks in amazement. 

By the end of the day, Mimi and Hattie tot up their score: three laptops, four tablets and eight mobile phones. “Not a bad afternoon’s work, if I say so myself,” says Mimi. Hattie agrees: “Well, my dear, it looks as though you have found yourself a new job!”